A birthday. A celebration. A day of relaxation, of pampering, of being all about you.
Until you become a parent.
To be honest I never thought about having my birthday not be about me.
I like to consider myself a fairly giving and caring person (fingers crossed I'm not wrong!) and 364 days of the year I focus on everyone else.
But March 12....March 12 is my day. My day to be selfish and celebrate me. My day to have all my friends and family surrounding me...singing to me....celebrating me.
This year was different though. My little woman was ill. Like really ill. Like I don't want anyone else to catch her cooties ill. So out went the party, the celebrating, the fun. March 12 was about her. My girl. My love.
I never considered this aspect of parenthood before and although I was feeling pretty down this weekend (yeah I felt sorry for myself) I now am starting to feel blessed.
You see I got to spend my day with the two loves of my life. I ate sushi and had a nice glass of wine. I relaxed. I snuggled with my little lady. She gave me hugs and kisses all day and my husband did the dishes. My mom stopped by and relaxed with us too.
So even though the day did not go according to plan I still had a great day. It's just these littler reminders when it comes to our lives as parents about how things really are different. I really don't think you are ever prepared (even if you think you are) to change every aspect of your life.
***I did not create this post in hopes of pity. I created it so that if you are ever presented in a situation where you are feeling down you can think back and remember that you are not alone and that it is ok to be a little selfish sometimes. That is is normal to have your world turned upside down and that sometimes you forget that it was. That parenthood is tough and no matter how ready for it you are...there are aspects of it that you just never really consider.***
**Looking for something to get me for my birthday? How about checking out the RLM sponsors! Promise it will make my day! :) **
i know your party was cancelled but it sounds like you had a great evening! i try to focus on the positive rather than the negative but don't always suceed. thank you for this post, i think it's always nice to have a reminder that things arent always going to work out as we like (especially with kiddos)!
ReplyDeleteerin
Sorry your wee-one was ill. I can totally relate to the selfishness on your birthday. After going now 4 years of not really getting "my day" anymore, every other day seems to run together until the kids birthdays. It changes when you become a parent, to give up thinking of yourself to thinking of others all day every day to every hour and minute of the day. When the birthdays arise for multiple kiddos, look out. This year I think we got off easy. Zach was napping as Gwen had her 4th birthday. So the day was all about her, anything and everything she would ask for (within reason, of course) was hers. Her little brother was no where in sight to steal her attention. Now, in 17 days Zach will have a birthday and I know I can't banish Gwen to go have nap time while her brother opens presents and have a day to himself. It will be a first for her, to not be the center of the world, ha. She will learn as we have when we became parents, to think of others first. You do get that one special day of selfishness, enjoy while it lasts!
ReplyDeleteI love your post. It is so rewarding as a parent to see their children grow. Life has a lot of ups, downs, twist and turns but always teaching us something. My reward is seeing my beautiful daughter become a wonderful mom, loving wife and a daughter all to be proud of. Love you Mom
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